Context Clues
- Guy #1: I can't watch the YouTube videos because my speakers aren't working.
- Guy #2: Well BOOOOOOOOOO to your state goverment speakers, Amen?
- Guy #1: How you know my speakers are state government?
- Guy #2: Because you threw around context clues such as "advocate" "council" and "The City of Baltimore" in the past 24 hours worth of email exchange.
You might be a state employee if….
posted 2 years ago
You said you needed help with mailing something. Dropped everything - and left with a comb in your hand to get your blood drawn. (blank stare & flat tire wishes)…
State Employee facebooking during business hours.
The Universal Language of State Employees
- Mississippi State Employee: I am so hungry...think I'm gonna binge eat and then go to bed.
- Maryland State Employee: I wanna binge but all I have is dip (no chips) molded bread, and hot sauce.
- Mississippi State Employee: I was right where you are last week #stateemployee
- Maryland State Employee: lmao we're being furloughed. Can't afford food #stateemployee
- Mississippi State Employee: They fired my supervisor, manager & director...I'm employee #1 right now...I'm trying to avoid the chopping block.
- Maryland State Employee: dayummm that sucks! They're not firing us yet but we're taking a pay cut for 8 months.
- Mississippi State Employee: Oh dayum...pay cuts right at Christmas...gotta love the state.
- Maryland State Employee: yep...then they had the nerve to say our holiday party won't be catered this year & we all have to bring a dish. Fuck that!Everyone KNOWS Brenda in accounting has roaches!
- Mississippi State Employee: LMAO !!!!!! We have a Brenda as well!
- Maryland State Employee: lmaoooo I think all state offices do
- Mississippi State Employee: Brenda's and Keisha's (and Keisha is the office hoe)
- Maryland State Employee: omg yes! Stealing office supplies for her illegitimate son's last minute school project about the solar system.
- Mississippi State Employee: LMAO...wait - I took a coupla rolls of invisible tape Friday so I could wrap Christmas gifts....#stateemployee !!!
- Maryland State Employee: *DEADDD* I printed fancy address labels for my Christmas cards last week...I wanna use the postage machine but that's pushing it.
- Mississippi State Employee: Ha! Yeah..the postage machine is pushing it..but, I love working for the state..I always have great pens.
- Maryland State Employee: yeaaa I always order those fancy pens. When my co-worker 1st started, he had them order a $32 pen!
- Mississippi State Employee: It's always good to sucker the new guy/girl into ordering the crazy shyt !
- Maryland State Employee: yea or get them to cover for you on a 3 hr lunch break
- Mississippi State Employee: DAYUM! I miss those lunch breaks..like I said, I'm employee #1 now. Going in 15mins early, staying 10mins late...it SUCKS!
You Might Be A State Employee If….
posted 2 years ago
You’re eating last night’s leftovers out of this container for lunch today…..
Sometimes I wish the communal microwave was located in another state and not across from my desk.
You Might Be A State Employee If….
posted 2 years ago
You throw 5 inches of paperwork in a box under your desk so you can leave 15 minutes early.
posted 2 years ago
